March 12, 2008

Shoes aren't footly salvation

So I'm still getting all those flylady e-mails, and did I mention that she has a thing about shoes? As a psychological gimmick to convince my brain it's work time I don't mind it. I don't do it, but if that's what cleans your counters then yea you for doing it. What does drive me nuts are the number of testimonials concerning someone's poor pitiful feet and how things would have just been peachy if they'd been wearing shoes all the time. If you've got cracked heels and spurs and pains in your ankles or wherever I'll bet you $20 that at least 90% of the problem isn't from waltzing around barefoot. You got odd bones? Stop taking costco fake calcium or drinking that gallon of milk you can't digest very well and hit the leafy greens. Then...go butter your toast. Yes I said butter. Toss that smart/sham butter and get some real stuff that actually had a prior bovine existence. It will help you assimilate all your nutrients and stop those weird aches. If your heels still hurt try drinking more water. You could well be walking over the reflexology point for your kidneys, and if they're hurting so will your heels. If on top of this you aren't rotting your bones with a daily (or weekly) pint of rootbeer I'd say you're starting to cover some territory. Just remember, flip flops aren't satan's temptations for the downfall of our arches, and keds aren't the embodiment of bipedal virtue.

1 comment:

Serena said...

Yay for butter! And no shoes! Unless it's snowing out, I wear flip flops or sandals. And shoes in the house? Shudders....